Saturday, September 20, 2014

Things I Learned This Week


It's been an interesting week, and I've learned a few things along the way that I thought might be useful to pass on.

1. If you don't know what you're having for dinner, don't eat all of your starches before dinner.

2. Please don't think that you will be able to eat 4 cups of vegetables for dinner because you didn't bother to eat them at any other time during the day.

3. If you're craving something sweet, do not buy 2 bags of "fun size" candies because it's more economical. It may be more economical for your wallet, but not your waistline.

4. If you are an occasional drinker of "Dunkaccinos" (which is basically just chocolate & coffee flavored sugar and powdered creamer), and even if you sometimes get the "Turbo Shot", do not suddenly start drinking four cups of coffee per day. Eventually, your body will revolt.

5. When you combine multiple "fun size" candies from Lesson #3 & your third and fourth cups from Lesson #4 on the same day, at roughly 2:30 in the afternoon, several things happen.

Suddenly you just don't feel so great. You realize that it might be from your heart racing. Or from the sudden blood sugar spike. Or from the pounding headache. Maybe from the upset stomach. It could, of course, be a combination of all these things, but you're not really sure because you can't seem to concentrate on one thing long enough to make a decision.

One of your children will come to ask you a school-related question, but end up asking you if you've been eating sugar. Then she stays for the show.

What show you ask? The one that you seem to be the star of because you can't sit still or stop laughing about everything. The music in your head makes you dance. Professional comedians have nothing on you.


Then, of course, comes the fallout. Your heart will still be racing and your head will still be pounding, but your blood sugar will drop & you will need to eat some actual food. However, you were so busy being silly that you forgot to make dinner. So you order pizza. Uh-huh. In your delirious state, you aren't thinking about the fact that it's more starchy carbs, just that it sounds tasty & you don't have to think about preparing it.

Your husband may or may not use the word "detox" on multiple occasions.

Sleeping is sort of a joke. But you knew that was coming, right? YOU are more sensible than I am! What you may not be aware of is just how long the effects last. It's at least a day. Maybe a little more. All of the bad side effects without all the funny business.

6. You are never too old to learn something new. I learned how to diagram prepositional phrases!

Change that "He" to a "She" & it would be so on point for this week!

Did you learn anything this week?
Jenny, aka

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